There's no beating about the bush, I am dreading this next race. There, I've said it out loud. Some or most of my closest friends know that prior to joining the race I couldn't bring myself to contemplate the Atlantic crossing and I was somehow miraculously going to get from Canada to Cork. I've got one hour before I have to join the boat and I am still unable to think about it. If I could get off now I would without hesitation or a look backward at the fleet.
Our tactitians told us last night that there are 2 options for our route;
1) head north then east - this is approx 200 miles shorter distance than opt 2, however we will have wind, waves and tide against us so it will be a hard 3-4 day slog and far from comfortable sailing.
2) head east then north - should be a much quicker race start but will still have to head north at some point and at this stage we don't have the weather to know if we'll still have a hard slog of it at the end.
I am just hoping and praying we go with option 2. When I joined the race in Hawaii we had just the awful conditions we could be about to face again and that was no laughing matter. I was scared out of my boots for the first week of that sail and I don't want to feel that fear again thank-you very much.
This morning I have been trying to tell myself over and over that I wanted to challenge myself, to feel a sense of achievement and to accomplish something big in the name of Matthew and so onboard I must go. Wish me luck.
T xx